Being highly sensitive is a strength,
if you use it correctly!
In 2001, I read a report about High Sensitivity and knew, that's me.
For me, that was interesting information, but it didn't have a big impact on me, because I had with the High Sensitivity no difficulties.
Two reasons why my high sensitivity developed into a strength!
My mother, herself highly sensitive , took my feelings and perceptions seriously. Whether I didn't want to wear certain clothes, didn't like something to eat, or was sensitive to pain; she didn't try to persuade me or force anything on me. She simply cooked food I liked. If I didn't like something, there was bread as an alternative. Without coercion and without complaining. She never said, "pull yourself together," "it's not that bad," "that wasn't so great," or similar things.
She took my emotional world seriously. And if I didn't want to give someone a kiss or a handshake, she respected that. Which wasn't yet a given at the time.
When family members urged her to be stricter, otherwise I would eventually walk all over her or have a hard time later in life, she just said: Let her be, she doesn't mean any harm.
You and my great-grandmother (also highly sensitive) always conveyed to me that I can trust my gut feeling. Alongside all – even massive – conflicts, they always showed me that I am right, just as I am. And my father, in his loving way, also supported me in daring to do things, just doing them, actively engaging with life.
Of course, there were also many conflicts, and we often didn't have it easy with each other, and still don't. But one thing is always there and has carried me through my life: I can rely on my gut feeling, and I am right just as I am.
I am very grateful for that, because for me that is great happiness. And I repeatedly encounter highly sensitive people who did not have this happiness. Who feel their gut feeling but do not take it seriously, who feel that no one understands them, or that they are wrong.
Richard Bandler, one of the founders of NLP says:
"It's never too late to have a happy childhood!"
And that is the second point why I, with my High Sensitivity I am happy. Of course, my childhood and my life were anything but smooth. In the course of my professional career, I reflected early on and, above all, learned techniques to deal with negative experiences and my High Sensitivity to deal with.
How did NLP support me in my high sensitivity?
Especially NLP helped me to set boundaries. I can influence my emotional diversity and intensity and deal with situations that used to quickly overstimulate me differently.
Through NLP understand myself and others better. I can remain in compassion without pity overwhelming me. I can recognize impending overstimulation in advance and act preventatively. In the meantime I take myself just as important as the others, because then everyone benefits.
The period in which emotions resonate with me is significantly shorter, and I get out of thought loops faster. These are just a few areas of my high sensitivity where my learned techniques support me. And anyone can learn these techniques. It is important to always adapt them individually for everyone.
High sensitivity in all its facets
My daughter and my husband are also highly sensitive. Some traits are similar in us and some are totally different. I am very sensitive to light, my husband is not. My husband is good at small talk, whereas the mere thought of it makes me shudder. I can quickly adapt to new situations, my daughter needs time for that.
I have been coaching since 2005 Highly sensitive people and offer seminars on the topic.
For me, the foundation for a happy life with high sensitivity rests on three pillars
- Connecting head and gut feelings – For clear thinking and quick/good decisions.
- Mechanisms of High Sensitivity understanding – For self-acceptance, proactive action, and options for action.
- Boundary setting – With the topics, people, situations, emotions of others, and one's own thoughts.
The combination of has proven particularly effective NLP , through which one learns to control inner states and Marte Meo (on my own), a video-based technique that supports connecting head and gut feelings.
Meanwhile, I have given over 330 workshops, seminars, lectures, and training courses on the topic of high sensitivity. It is wonderful to experience when people can rediscover and accept themselves in love.
